It was the first more-than-three-nights vacation that RH and I had taken since the whole "we had three kids what in the heck happened to our lives?!?!?!" episode had occurred.
I am sure we had a really amazing time....
But truthfully?
Neither of us can really remember it at all.
You see...
We came in a day late (and several dollars short) due to a delay caused by some nasty storms in the area.
We didn't arrive home until the evening of May 21st.
The next day as we tried to celebrate our eldest son's birthday we had yet another event.
This one pretty much wiped every relaxing memory out of our heads.
Two years ago.
Wow.
I guess I can comprehend that.
I mean....so so so so much has happened since then.
We demo'd a house/bought a house/sold a lot/sold a house/bought a house.
My youngest started kindergarten.
We moved several times in search of home.
We got a new dog.
My eldest started (ahhhh!) middle school.
We had many birthdays.
RH turned....well....older.
I had heart surgery.
My dad had back surgery.
I consumed 2,318 concretes from Shakes.
Time must have passed to pack so much in!
But on the other hand....
It's hard to believe that it's been two whole years.
Some of the memories are still so very very vivid in my mind.
Some of the emotions are still much closer to the surface than I suspected they would be at this point.
Yesterday I ran in the Joplin Memorial Run.
It was really a super event and there were TONS of people participating....so cool to see!
Last year I was worried that I would be so emotional it might be hard for me to run.
It was hard....but pretty much just because of the
There were a few "oh wow" moments....but mostly it was just trying to get through the 13 miles of
This year I went into the race pretty much just concerned with how un-properly-trained I was for this.
I hoped I wouldn't let my running partner down by crawling the last few miles.
However.
However.
As we jostled about in the starting corral they released 161 balloons and called for 161 seconds of silence to honor the 161 people who had died from that storm.
(And I thought about how very easily two 7 year olds and my aunt and uncle could have made 4 more balloons.)
Then they told the story about the young lady who sang the national anthem; how she had been working in the pharmacy that was completely leveled and how frantically her parents had been searching for her.
(And I remembered seeing the pharmacy after the storm and the sick feeling of not knowing where my child was .)
Then they introduced the woman who officially "started the race" and she told the story of how she had rushed her mother (who didn't make it) to the hospital and her mother said, "Don't worry about me....whatever happened God has it under control."
(And I remembered telling God that I knew he loved my son and nephew even more than me and that He knew what was best for them and I handed them over to His big 'ol hands.)
Then we started.
And we ran.
And we looked at the names on the banners.
And I said to my running partner, "Hey...remember that name? That's the baby who...."
And she said, "Stop. I can't."
And we ran.
And we came to the part of the town where the trees disappear.
And we didn't say anything.
And we ran.
Then we walked because it was hot.
And we finished.
And I ran into my friend Tiffany, who told me how emotional it had been for she and her husband....and we both teared up.
And I went home to my intact amazing family in my whole safe house.
Wednesday is the official two year anniversary of the tornado.
Today is the "same day" in the fact that it's Sunday and Joplin High School is having its graduation ceremony.
Today we have horrible storms predicted for our area after five o'clock.
Hail, thunderstorms, tornadoes and such.
Today everyone is posting deja vu's all over facebook.
Today I checked my emergency kit in the basement to make sure it was stocked.
Today one of my good friends and her hubby are coming to stay the night because they don't have a basement and they got totally blown away two years ago.
Today.
Two years ago.
A lifetime.
A moment.
Truth?
God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow.
He has His plans....and I am grateful.
So so so so so grateful.
Am I nervous?
Well....yeah.
A little.
I thought I wasn't....but a rumble of thunder made my stomach twist so I guess I must be.
Am I freaking out?
Not yet.
Just being prepared.
Thanking God for warnings and perspective and a basement.
So I will try and ignore the fact that my usually calm and somewhat lazy dog is nervously pacing around me in circles.
I will sit down with my family and friends and have dinner.
I will tuck my kids into bed and crack my window so I can hear the sirens if need be.
And I will continue to praise God.
I may be praising Him as I run to the basement....but I will praise Him!
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